Thursday, May 28, 2009

The World's Most Interesting Man


Television has seen an interesting, but not altogether surprising, advertising event of late: promotion of Dos Equis beer by The World's Most Interesting Man. For those who have yet to see the ads of which I speak, TWMIM is portrayed as a gentleman of years and experience, even more so when we include his beard.

While the accomplishments of TWMIM are over the top fiction, advertisers have long known that sex sells; and now, Dos Equis has latched onto a truth that every thinking person understands: experience and self-confidence are sexy, and these ingredients don't usually come wrapped in a young package that conforms to 21st century self-serving standards of beauty. That old school manners are cool; most women find it attractive when a man not only knows which way the bill of his ball cap is supposed to point, but also when to take the fucking thing OFF; that poking a woman on Facebook is a poor substitute for growing the balls to tell her, in an irresistibly tasteful and mature fashion, that you'd love to poke her for real.

Manliness is not a lost art, and its greatest icons transcend youth. Consider: In 1989, at nearly 60 years of age, Sir Sean Connery was voted People Magazine's sexiest man alive. In his mid-sixties, Ian McShane played what is arguably the most primally sexy role of his career as Al Swearengen in HBO's Deadwood. Don't take my word for it. Ask Mrs. LFM who, you will recall, decisively claimed and married a man 25 years her senior. I throw these out as illustrative examples of a Great Truth, often encapsulated in the time honoured addage: Never fight with an old man. If he's to old to fight, he'll just kill you.

Early advertising forays into this area were made by the people who bring you Old Spice aftershave and assorted other miscellaneous scented masculine products. These ads featured the inimitable Bruce Campbell, star of such films as Army of Darkness and Bubba Ho-Tep, author of If Chins Could Kill and Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way. Classics all.

Take a look:





Not bad. And now we have the World's Most Interesting Man. Sit back and give these gems a screening.

























It is said that not advertising is like winking at a woman in the dark. You know you're doing it but she doesn't. These totally hit the mark and I hope they continue to help me crave Canadian beer.

Stay thirsty my friends.

Friday, May 1, 2009

I'll Take My Humour Black

The Tuareg, so called "Blue Men of the Desert" are a nomadic herding people of the Sahara. They like their coffee:

Black as the Devil,
Strong as Death,

Sweet as Love,
And hot as Hell.

This pronouncement has always spoken to me because pretty much everything I appreciate in life fits into one or more of those four categories. I first encountered it while watching a National Geographic Special so long ago that, as I recall, the Dead Sea had only just been diagnosed as sick; and now, to help you eradicate the ear worm that is Elmer Bernstein's National Geographic theme music, I'll pause to let you get it out of your system ...


So now, moving on to the point of today's post, I would like to thank
Markksr for his post last evening on the "Whine & Cheese" forum of Bladeforums.com, the content of which appears below. Click on the picture to view it in larger, more readable sizing.

I've been looking for a pointed bit of artwork to introduce a post aimed at all the sheeple out there who are starving our pig farmers out of fear that they can contract the latest flavour of influenza from eating pork. There's lots of crap you have always been able to get from eating improperly cooked pork products, but influenza isn't one of them. Now if you sleep with your pigs you have other issues and probably don't read this blog anyway.

The weekend is almost here. Get out there, buy a few slabs of pig and fucking barbecue it. Mrs. LFM and I will be doing just that.